The day I got on the train in London and traveled to Paris was the morning of January 7, 2015. Coincidentally, that was the same morning that terrorists attacked the satirical newspaper Charlie Hebdo. So as I was sitting on the train eating my cheese and bread like a good backpacking tourist I received a text from my mother telling me to be safe, that a terrorist attack had just happened in Paris.
I spent the next two days being a tourist in the city, and my life was largely unaffected by the event. I tried to grapple with the fact that I was being a tourist, just a dumb tourist, while an entire country was in mourning. I took pictures in front of monuments, monuments where the flags were at half mast. I stood in the rain, waiting my turn to go into Notre Dame. I walked through the Louvre and made my way through a sea of Asian tourists with selfie sticks. I helped my new Chilean friend clip a lock with his boyfriend’s name in a heart onto a bridge, a symbol of eternal love. And I walked past “je suis Charlie” posters in cafes, restaurants, and my hostel.
The experience in Paris was a strange one, because I was trying to equate the wonderful time I was having in the city with the fact that a terrorist attack had just occurred.
Now terrorists have attacked the City of Love once again, and this time have killed over 140 people. While this was happening, I was standing in Under Armour, my new place of employment, bemoaning the fact that it takes so long to register a passport and be cleared to receive a paycheck.
I don’t know how to address what happened in Paris. I’m still trying to come to terms with it in my mind. The things I do know:
- I am so grateful to Facebook for having a safety check-in, so that I know my friends there are safe.
- We are so lucky to feel so safe. I worry about a mugging, not a terrorist attack. Maybe I should worry more.
- The world is a messed up place.
All I know is that I am grateful that I am safe, devastated that people want to hurt others in such a violent way, and angered at the response. I have seen many responses, to be fair, but they all fit neatly into two groups. One, pray for Paris. And two, “I’ll pray for European victims of terror as much as they pray for Jewish victims of terror”. This last group…it solves nothing. Bitterness and resentment does not bring back anyone from the dead, does not save the incredibly misguided and angry people who think that violence is the best way to achieve their goals, and does not help the world heal and move forward.
It is not necessary to turn the other cheek and get hit again in order to leave behind your resentment. If everyone would have compassion, the world would be a better place.
Peace to Paris.
